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Your Technology Problems...SOLVED

AUGUST 31, 2011


What's New at Experts Exchange
From the Central Coast and beyond

Making the extra effort

Nata's Corner
Big fines and discounts

The winners of our haiku contest

In Brief
Things you might have missed

Who did what through Aug. 27


This time we mean it: Call it crossed signals. Jason Levine, AKA WhackAMod, one of Experts Exchange's site administrators, was supposed to host a meet-up at Lodo's Bar and Grill in Denver last week, but a mix-up in communications forced its postponement to Thursday, September 29 from 4 pm to 8 pm. If you're so inclined, feel free to come bend his ear about anything EE; you can RSVP here; the beer is on us.

Coffee -- and donuts: A month or so ago, we ran a little promotion that offered a coffee mug for each person in a new business account. Now, we're sweetening the pot. Purchase or upgrade to a Business Account from Experts Exchange between now and September 17, and we'll send you not only the mugs, but coffee and enough donuts (at least a dozen for a small workgroup account) to keep you bouncing off the cubicle walls until the weekend. Details on our blog.

Webinar: Microsoft MVP Scott Helmers has produced his second webinar for EE on Visio, this one on the top ten new features in Microsoft's latest release of the software. It can be seen on Experts Exchange's YouTube Channel.

Podcast: EE's next podcast, featuring a round table conversation among the site's administrators about ... well, it could be almost anything... will be up on EE's iTunes channel on Friday morning. Knowing these people, it should be pretty entertaining.

TweetShirt Tuesday: The winner of the TweetShirt Tuesday t-shirt was sureshggg, who tweeted about getting Excel.

Moving up... but fortunately for Experts Exchange, not moving on, is Matt Huxtable, one of the Zone Advisors, who after acing his exams (third photo in the sequence) is headed to Cambridge University in the a couple of weeks. You can read Jenn Prentice's interview with Matt and leave a comment.

New member: Varun Kumar was born to Loganathan and Pachyammal on August 23 in Tiruvannamalai, Chennai. He weighted 2.4 kg (5 lbs, 5 oz) and was 21 inches (53 cm) long.

patrickab In requiem: We received word last week that Patrick Arnold-Baker, known to EE's membership as patrickab, had passed away due to brain cancer. He was 66. A member of Experts Exchange since 2002, he started his career learning how to use Excel, and wound up in the EE Hall of Fame as one of the most respected Experts in a topic area filled with them. He is survived by his wife, Thuc-Nghi; daughters Antonia and Thomasin; his brother, James; two grandchildren, a niece and a nephew. Services are tomorrow (September 1) at 2.30 pm at Breakspear Crematorium (East Chapel), Ruislip, Middlesex. You can read the Times obituary and guest book. In dlmille's words, he is missed already.


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The winners of our haiku contest, along with a few that deserve special notice, even if they didn't win. And yes, we know we picked twelve, but that's what happens when you spark the imaginations of Experts Exchange's creative membership; you can read all of the entries and even add one if you're so moved, but there won't be any more prizes.

Experts Exchange Haiku Laureates
By bryanzorlu
Three things are certain
Death, taxes, and system crash
EE helps with one

By RPPreacher
I google the issue
All results link to EE
I must subscribe now!

By sdstuber
For twelve ninety-five!
24/7 support
Are you kidding me?

By nickmbnabb
Don't know the answers
Don't even know the questions
Experts Exchange knows

By phototropic
At first there are points,
And then there are those T-shirts,
And then ... expertness.

By igloobob
time costs much money
ll the experts together
saves you a fortune!
  By erniebeek
Japanese, yes: hai
Japanese, solution: ku
EE is HaiKu

By PaulHews
T-shirt says genius
But I am not really one
Just been here for years

By knightEknight
Join me in a song.
Old MacDonald's server crashed,
E - I - E - "EE"!

By maglinger
Many minds as one
solve our problems more quickly
than one mind alone.

By matsonpp
Boss writing pink slip
Must resolve this issue quick!
I head to EE

By laurel25
Time is what I save
Perfect answers for my needs
EE - love you so!
Special consideration
By cleopatrark, who responded to the call of Site Administrator modus_operandi and composed a true Shakespearean sonnet

A MOD has but one request, he allows
That for him a sonnet someone does bleat
Who among us will a sonnet avow
Could a Lizard follow the sonnet beat

Allow this Lizard to take on the chore
The Lounge Gox will do this without a doubt
She will search for words from within her core
Although her brain may suffer wordy drought

Stretching her brain as elasticity
Skipping a haiku where the words are few
She rattles on the words in ecstasy
On an on the words out her mouth they flew

Will the MOD sit and shout aloud with glee
Or will her simply say nice try oh gee
By DanRollins, whose creative use of links earned his poem consideration.

Don't fail to peruse
The finely-crafted stanzas
Of Lounge Lizards here.

By coral47, who proved that no other site has anything quite like the Lounge -- or Badgers, for that matter.

LLs eyes blazing,
Their traditional Haiku
Hijacked by Badgers.
  By mplungjan, because 57 shirts and donating to charity are part of EE's community fabric.

Fifty-seven shirts
waiting to be sent to me
perhaps charity

By slightwv, who made up for in quantity what he lacked in ... something, but came up with the most creative way of mentioning the site.

Seek Experts Exchange Dot Com
Problems Disappear

Nata's Corner

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Nata's PictureNot that most of you will ever have any reason to use this, but if you open the Windows 7 calculator through the command box (Start --> calc) and then select the Scientific view, you can use the p key on your keyboard to get a slice of Pi.

Last issue, I had a little item about Sanford Wallace, AKA the Spam King, and how he'd been arrested and charged with a bunch of felonies related to his spamming. One of the groups of people he used to spam for was Canadian pharmacies -- you are probably still getting spam from them, because it's a big business, and the cost of sending millions of emails is so low. How big? Well, last week, Google agreed to a $500,000,000 (that's half a billion dollars) fine for selling advertising to the same Canadian pharmacies. So... just to make sure... bypassing US regulations isn't evil? Can I quote you next April with the other half does the taxes?

Back in March, RSA, the company that makes those administrative tokens to access sensitive networks, had its servers breached, and that created all kinds of problems, including breaches at Morgan Stanley, the big financial services company, and HBGary, the company hired by Morgan Stanley to investigate the breaches. It turns out that the original breach was caused when an employee at RSA's parent company, EMC, opened a 13-word email that was a phishing attempt. One. It cost RSA at least $66 million in the April-June quarter alone, plus who knows how much damage it's done to their business.

The other half was an economics major for a while, and he loves explaining things to me in terms of supply and demand. HP kind of got a lesson in that last week after they announced a couple of weeks ago that they were discontinuing production of their WebOS devices at the end of September. The first thing that happened was that retailers cut the price to $99, which caused people to buy them like they were penny candy. That reduced the supply on eBay to increase in price to as high as $300 -- about 60 per cent of the $499 list price. Maybe that should tell people something about the prices they set for electronic devices.

Unemployment rates are dropping slightly (unless you're a worker laid off by the government) as more private sector jobs are being created, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't be smart about what you put on your resume... or your Facebook page. Like it or not, people are going to do searches and background checks, so it might not be a good idea to post those funny pictures of you at your cousin's Halloween party.

Finally, and I know I'm going to get in trouble for this, but one of the people in the office said that EE was doing a password audit, and found that a marketing intern was using the following password: "MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacramento". When asked why he had such a long password, he rolled his eyes and said: "Hello! It has to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital." You can't make this stuff up, honest.


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thinkpads_user on QuickBooks: thinkpads_user has become one of the more ... ubiquitous Experts, at least to the Moderators, who have become accustomed to his occasional expressions of frustration. But he is also a talented Expert, as tranvangiang17 found out when he had some questions about some apparently damaged accounts in Quickbooks: "He is not ranked GENIUS for nothing!!! Thanks guy."

mark_wills on SQL Server: mark_wills, in additon to being a Page Editor and Zone Advisor for pretty much anything having to do with databases, is also a Microsoft MVP in SQL Server, and his insanely detailed response to gberkeley's question about parsing responses to questions shows why. The answer selected includes four code snippets and refers to articles he wrote over two years ago. "It's a crying shame I can't award you a million points!!!! Your assistance has been so very helpful - I cannot thank you enough. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!"

In Brief

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Yes, but is it art: Ten Google logos that won't get approved by Larry Page. And since Steve Jobs quit, you won't see this from most iPods either.

That time of year: Burning Man started Monday. Silicon Valley geeks know the drill.

Lost in the shuffle: Amid all the sound and fury surround the resignation of Steve Jobs, you probably missed the news that CmdrTaco left Slashdot. Since the former only emailed a few folks, we're betting Rob Malda will actually be missed more.

What happens when you hit soft green cheese with a big ham?: The Big Splat.

Okay, so it's a little late for my birthday... but it's not too late to order me one as a Christmas present. Jus' sayin'. Also, compfixer101 graciously took the time to remind me exactly how old I am. Out of kindness, we won't reveal how many had to be explained to him.

Okay, this could get weird: Google is working on taking what you search for today, and using that information to help you with next year's searches. So, if you were a Mickey Mouse Club fan in the early 90s, you would be looking at something entirely different 20 years later, but Google will know.

This never would have happened when Steve was running things: (Yes, we know this came out before Steve Jobs resigned, but it makes for a great tag line.) Even though Lion is the most secure version of the Mac OS X operating system yet, Black Hat reserchers say that Macs in enterprise networks are "inherently insecure".

Oh, and in case you didn't know it: Your web server is probably vulnerable to being shut down.

Of course. How else would they know what ads you really want: Google says that if you want to use Google+, you have to say who you really are. Which is going to send Netminder into an existential crisis, because he says he's really who he says he is.

For all you n00bs out there: Seven sure-fire ways to get unfollowed on Twitter; they forgot #8: Follow Fridays and not slapping Twitter spammers. Also, the glossary.

Signs of the Apocalypse: What happens when you need more money than donations bring in? You sell out, find a venture capitalist or just start charging people when they don't use your service. Also, zorvek sent us a sign that is right on schedule.


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New Geniuses: Most issues, we would be highlighting the achievements of the two people who earned their third Genius certificates, but we're going to make an exception lead off this issue's list with someone who has earned his first: strung, who by reaching the level in the Apple OS topic area, became the first member of Experts Exchange to earn 1,000,000 points in any Apple technology. Picking up their third Genius certificates were alanhardisty in Outlook and leakim971 in Jquery. Earning their first Genius t-shirts were LZ1 in Cascading Style Sheets and billprew in VB Script. Our thanks and congratulations to all of you!


  • CEHJ has earned 12,000,000 points in the Java topic area.
  • mwvisa1 has has reached the 5,000,000 point level overall since joining EE.
  • CodeCruiser reached the 7,000,000 point level.
  • Merete has earned 6,000,000 points since joining EE.
  • mkline71 has earned 4,000,000 points in the Active Directory topic area.
Expert In Topic Area Certificate
pratima_mcs.NET ProgrammingGuru
Pryrates.NET ProgrammingGuru
deepaklakkad.NET ProgrammingMaster
tommyBoy.NET ProgrammingMaster
mas_oz2003.NET ProgrammingWizard
dvt_localboyActive DirectoryMaster
maxloiActive DirectoryMaster
khkremerAdobe Creative SuiteMaster
strungApple OSGenius
jhyieslaApple OSGuru
gheistBackup / RestoreMaster
LeeOsborneUKBlackberry HardwareMaster
IronmannenCisco PIX/ASAMaster
SouljaCisco PIX/ASAMaster
khkremerDocument ManagementMaster
BudDurlandEmail SoftwareMaster
jamietonerHardware ComponentsGuru
mattdnguyenInternet MarketingMaster
mkline71IT AdministrationMaster
pmasottaLinux NetworkingMaster
wesly_chenLinux OS DevGuru
Mac2010Mac OS XMaster
sanjsantokiMicrosoft IIS Web ServerMaster
GLComputingMisc DatabasesGuru
harfangMisc DatabasesGuru
RacimoMisc DatabasesMaster
theartfuldazzlerMisc DatabasesMaster
DaveBaldwinMisc HardwareMaster
craigbeckMisc NetworkingMaster
TommySzalapskiMisc ProgrammingGuru
tagitMisc Web DevGuru
dgofmanMisc Web DevMaster
GrahamSkanMS AccessWizard
puppydogbuddyMS ApplicationsGuru
burrcmMS ApplicationsMaster
KCTSMS ExcelGuru
NeilsrMS ExcelMaster
ukerandiMS ExcelMaster
als315MS OfficeMaster
finalwordMS OfficeMaster
Expert In Topic Area Certificate
zabiullahMS SharePointGuru
navtej_dhillonMS SharePointMaster
anujnbMS SQL ServerMaster
barletMS SQL ServerMaster
rajeevnandanmishraMS SQL ServerMaster
knightEknightMS SQL ServerWizard
RacimoMS SQL Server 2005Guru
James0628MS SQL Server 2005Master
NicoboMS SQL Server 2005Master
pratima_mcsMS SQL Server 2005Wizard
EugeneZMS SQL Server 2008Guru
sammySeltzerMS SQL Server 2008Guru
cmangusMS SQL Server 2008Master
Olaf_DoschkeMS SQL Server 2008Master
QPRMS SQL Server 2008Master
mwvisa1MS SQL Server 2008Sage
chris_bottomleyMS WordSage
kaufmedMySQL ServerMaster
sudarakaMySQL ServerMaster
rfc1180Networking ProtocolsMaster
praveencpkOracle DatabaseMaster
bportlockPHP FrameworksMaster
als315Query SyntaxMaster
TerryAtOpusRegular ExpressionsSage
ACH1LLESSBS Small Business ServerMaster
chakkoSBS Small Business ServerMaster
ronnypotSBS Small Business ServerWizard
BadotzScripting LanguagesMaster
oBdAShell ScriptingMaster
woolmilkporcSSH / Telnet SoftwareGuru
jamietonerStorage MiscGuru
thinkpads_userTax / Financial SoftwareMaster
billprewVB ScriptGenius
ryancysVB ScriptMaster
dj_alikVisual Basic.NETMaster
kalpesh2804Visual Basic.NETMaster
ZoppoVisual C++.NETGuru
naulivVoice Over IPMaster
leakim971Web Languages/StandardsGuru
HainKurtWeb Languages/StandardsMaster
mkline71Windows 2000Wizard
gheistWindows 2003 ServerGuru
Maniac_47Windows 2003 ServerMaster
x-menWindows 2003 ServerMaster
dragon-itWindows 2003 ServerWizard
DavisMcCarnWindows 7Guru
hjgodeWindows MobileGuru
ChiefITWindows NetworkingGuru
billprewWindows OSMaster
merowingerWindows Server 2008Guru
spaperovWindows Server 2008Guru
chakkoWindows Server 2008Master
NetfloWindows Server 2008Master
Number-1Windows Server 2008Master
gtworekWindows Server 2008Wizard
KCTSWindows Server 2008Wizard
QlemoWindows XPWizard
craigbeckWireless HardwareMaster